JR tried to steal my \1000!

After somehow ballsing up the Fare Adjustment machine as I attempted to load some extra cash onto my icoca card, I was left with the following situation: a 1000 yen note that had not quite disappeared into the machine and a card that was wedged in the slot. At this point feeling unabashed I yanked away at the card and it finally gave way, accompanied by a siren and flashing lamps.

I expected the JR workers to come galloping over, but they didn't so I had to hover by the machine, loosing all poise and absorb more strange looks than usual.

Finally being able to explain the situation and the back of the machine being opened, I soon thought I would be reunited with my money and all would be well. Alas no. Mr projectile saliva the station manager kept insisting I had only put in 100 yen as that was all he could find in the back of the machine. He had no reason to doubt me as Japanese people just don't try it on all the time unlike Brits, so seemed puzzled and said he would investigate the matter and call me back the next day after they had cashed up in the morning. So far only 15 minutes expended!

Three days later I hadn't received the phone call, which was more annoying than the lost money, so I dragged the boyfriend (who insists on being called "hero" after helping me out of too many scrapes recently) along with me. I soon recognised the bark of the saliva dude and told him I hadn't been called back. He made a big fuss about not believing I hadn't been called back and then invited us into the den under the tracks that JR workers borrow into for 10 hours a day.

Initially, I was even a little bit excited as the most you usually get to see of a JR worker is a head popping out of the ticket machine if you call for assistance (very disconcerting the first time you witness it!) However, after spending almost 40 minutes in the warren cum office and being asked whether I may have in fact put my money in the wrong slot or listening to suggestions that a thief might have stealthily taken the money in front of my very eyes (ten minutes to check the video footage proved that this preposterous event hadn't in fact occurred) and the Hero almost exploded and demanded to know why we were sitting here listening to this nonsense and that if they had called me back as promised we wouldn't be wasting the tail end of a Saturday's sunlight.

After more examining of my card and protestations that no one could possible explain the mystery, we were finally allowed to leave. The station manager promised to look into the matter further and we said that we'd call by again on our return.

The matter concluded with spittle and declarations that words could not express his regret and a 1000 yen JR pass card.